Wednesday, August 12, 2015

Miami Marlins: Magnum Dog

I told you last year I will never bitch about indoor baseball again. My experience in Miami confirmed that promise. Last season I was able to enjoy the Marlin’s modern new ballpark with the roof open. This time, keeping the roof closed saved the game and kept fans from getting soaked by one of Miami’s renowned torrential downpours. What it didn’t save me from was a thirty dollar ticket to see a game in a half-filled stadium.

You know the weird thing about seeing a game in Marlins Park? The fans. This night the Marlins were playing the Red Sox. The cheers were reversed. There was more cheering for the Red Sox than the hometown Marlins. Fans wore more Red Sox apparel as well. Same thing happened last year. It seems the Marlins do not have a large following but do well as gracious hosts for visiting teams. I guess it is the snowbird thing. Lots of folks from somewhere else in Miami. But, damn, it is strange.

After getting my bobblehead fix by staring at the large, plexiglass-encased bobblehead museum on the main concourse I was ready to hunt down the big specialty dog in the park known as the “Magnum Dog.” Once again research paid off. Fans services didn’t know where to find it or that it even existed. I am finding fan services to be less than helpful on my quest. My inquiries outside of the ballpark revealed that the Magnum Dog is only available in the Clevelander. Marlins Park is the only MLB stadium with a nightclub inside, and it has a swimming pool in the nightclub. Swanky. Entry is ten bucks. And it is the only place you can get the Magnum Dog.

Despite the entry folks knowing zip about the specialty hot dog they served in the club they were working for, their manager knew of it and allowed me inside sans the ten clams for entry. Once inside the servers were helpful in ordering up the Magnum. And it comes delivered by attractive, young servers in a version of a Hooters costume.

Appeal-it is certainly a dog to seek out. Especially since it is somewhat of a mystery even for those that work in Marlins Park. 5

Ingredients-a very large Frank’s frank with fresh onions and beer cheese sauce. All top quality. 5

Uniqueness-nice name, but the ingredients don’t do a lot to separate it from its peers. It needs a Miami flair as well. 4

Monstrosity Factor-I couldn’t finish it despite being moderately hungry. The fact that it comes with fries helped. Plus, that is just one big wiener. 5

Value-here is where the Marlins fail. At $16 it is prices to begin with. The fact you have to pay $10 get to get the privilege of ordering it makes it a $26 hot dog, and it feeds only one. 1

Overall Taste-I thought that with that much meat I would get tired of it. I didn’t. It was tasty throughout the amount I could get down. 4.5
Unfortunately, the price does this dog in for a score of 24.5. The Magnum Dog is a great tasting monster but I simply cannot recommend dishing out $26 to get to it and eat it. Miami needs to make this dog available to the regular fans. The Braves have one kiosk stand to sell their monster dog at one spot in the ballpark. I recommend the same for the Marlins. Let the people have access to the best dog you offer.

You will also be happy to know that I DID NOT fall into the pool in the Clevelander.

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