Thursday, June 11, 2015

Cleveland Indians: The Thomenator

So what does whacking 612 home runs over a career get you besides a probable ticket to Cooperstown? Something even better than getting enshrined in the National Baseball Hall of Fame: having a ginormous and delicious hot dog named after you. The Thomenator is named after Jim Thome, a MLB slugger that spent the apex of his career with the Indians.


This over-the-top and out-of-the-park dog consists of a ten-inch Sugardale frank topped with sauerkraut, grilled onions and three pierogis. Frankly, a brick would taste good if it were topped with pierogis, but The Thomenator  taste like a dog born to be served in the ballpark. The bun wasn’t the freshest, but it still went down easy. DO NOT ATTEMPT to eat with your hands. I’m gonna need some extra strength Tide to get those mustard stains out of my shirt. This is strictly a fork dog.


Speaking of mustard, you MUST top off this dog (or any dog at Progressive Field) with Bertman Ballpark Mustard. It is a Cleveland-only hot dog staple that gives each dog served in the stadium a unique Cleveland taste. It was the only condiment I put on my dog and complimented The Thomenator perfectly.


Appeal-with it’s Schwarzenegger-like moniker, who could resist? 5


Ingredients-forget the rest. IT HAS PIEROGIS! 5


Uniqueness-great job making this dog something to seek out. 5


Monstrosity Factor-just shy of a perfect score. It’s big, but I have seen bigger. 4.5


Value-for $12 it is a good deal. It is the only meal you will need for the evening. Eat anything else and risk seeing your Thomenator again. 5


Overall Taste-again, nearly perfect score. The bun could be better and while the Sugardale frank was decent, replacing it with a Hebrew National would put this dog over the top. 4.5
APPEAL5
INGREDIENTS5
UNIQUENESS5
MONSTROSITY FACTOR4.5
VALUE5
OVERALL TASTE4.5
TOTAL29
Hard to believe, but a score of 29 of 30 only puts The Thomenator in three-way tie for first place. Make no mistake though, this is a dog to seek out when at Progressive Field. It is sold only in the right field concessions area. How good was it? In Thomenator language: I’ll be back.

4 comments:

  1. Had a 8 inch Fenway Frank at th Sox last weekend. No onions available, mustard tasteless, stale bun. Like the Sox, the dog has lost its bite.
    Bruce

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  2. what section at this stadium to buy that? I couldn't find anywhere. Help me please.

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    Replies
    1. The right field food concourse is the only place to purchase the Thomenator. There is a specialty hot dog stand there. They put all of their dogs on display as well. The regular concessions stands do not sell the Thomenator. Try one and let me know what you think. Get to the game hungry!

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